Happy Sexy Love How to bulletproof relationships with happy, sexy love
There’s no reason to settle for a dull or dormant sex life, once you discover how to enjoy and take your relationship through 7 stages of sex on the path to sexual ecstasy. In Part 1, you discovered how to move through the first two stages of sex, where many couples get stuck.
Now, find out how to get out of the dull stages of sex, where breakups often occur, in highlights of my radio conversation for A Lasting Love with Dr. Michael Broder, www.StageClimbing.com
Dr. Michael is a renowned psychologist and author whose best-selling books and audio programs help you enhance intimacy and increase sexual pleasure.
Hadley: You’ve said that Stage two “Toddlerhood” of a sexual relationship, can be dangerous if couples act out by having affairs and being selfish. How do we hold onto the positive toddler traits of curiosity, playfulness, resilience, sense of adventure and growth in Stage two as we take a sexual relationship into the next stage?
Dr. Michael: Stage three sex corresponds to childhood, where you stop being a toddler but you’re not yet an adolescent. A function of this stage is to learn rules to live by. Yet if you’re having sex in Stage three, chances are it’s with a whole set of rules that don’t serve you. Sex is only done between married people, once or twice a week, only in the bedroom with lights out.
Hadley: So rules stifle sexual creativity, pleasure and fun.
Dr. Michael: Exactly. And when one partner is operating in stage three sex, the other partner gets turned off. That’s the reason many relationships end or affairs begin.
Hadley: To move out of this stage, the positive, healthy attitude is for couples to find ways to keep sex fresh and exciting?
Dr. Michael: The best attitude is, “Let’s make our own rules and forget about the rules that were imposed on us. We’re adults now, and we don’t have to live by old dictums that don’t work anymore.” This attitude is needed in every part of your relationship.
Hadley: When you each accept that attitude, how to you move into stage four sex?
Dr. Michael: This stage is about finding yourself and your own uniqueness. When you have sex at stage four, it’s about feeling loved and respected by your partner, and pleasing your partner. Performance anxiety always is a stage four event, because it’s a concern about pleasing your partner and not about pleasure. So that’s not fulfilling sex.
Hadley: We want our partner to appreciate our wonderful qualities in Stage four, so we don’t feel rejected. To get out of this stage, do you get into finding more pleasure and passion?
Dr. Michael: It’s good to move beyond a fear of rejection and understand that rejection won’t kill you. Otherwise, sex would be something you do to avoid a negative.
Hadley: What you focus on expands, according to universal laws. So if you focus on the fear of rejection, you get more of it. Or focus on the passion, pleasure and intimacy you’re developing to get more of it in the next stages of sex.
Dr. Michael: Excellent way of saying it. Let’s look at Stage five. It’s the most dispassionate, because you focus more on your roles in life, and having sex is just one more role. Normal adults in our society are stuck here.
Hadley: Because they focus on duties, deadlines, and just getting by, instead of fulfilling their talents by following their bliss in life and love. How do we move out of dispassionate sex and reach a sexual peak of ecstasy?
Find out in Part 3 highlights of my radio conversation with Dr. Michael Broder. To hear the entire episode now, click here
You’ll also meet great singles during our first Love Breakthrough Experience and Spa Weekend at Heartland Spa outside of Chicago. I’ll help you make a quantum leap to love as you savor Heartland Spa’s superb meals, fitness classes, hikes, and luxurious spa treatments. Plus you meet great singles who value great health, fitness and love and enjoy this all-inclusive weekend adventure in award-winning Heartland Spa. There still are openings for our Singles Weekend in August so call to reserve your spot now: 1-800-545-4853 International 1-815-683-2182
In a relationship? Look for our Couples Love Breakthrough Experience and Spa Weekend coming soon to Heartland Spa.
Get the red-hot relationship you deserve,
Hadley Finch
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