Enjoy our Guest Post by America’s Love Mindset Expert, Debra Berndt, a former love junkie
Debra helps you do a breakup cleanse and get ready for real love:
From the sweet excitement of the fresh kiss of someone new to the emotional upheaval in the aftermath when the romance fizzles, the wave of love attraction can often be like a roller-coaster ride. Even during the depths of sorrow, there seems to be a certain pleasure in feeling something even if you are uncomfortable rather that the drab, boring dry spell of a dateless existence. The experience many times leads you searching for another fix and you pull yourself up and begin to feel hope again. You tell yourself that the next relationship will be the one that lasts.
I told myself that for years. Any fresh prospect that showed up in my life became my new hope for leaving the singles pool. Unfortunately, too soon without warning, he would always leave me disappointed. The rejections didn’t seem to stop me because as a love junkie, I needed my next fix. The drive for the romantic high was too great to think sensibly about what I really wanted in a mate or what I truly deserved. I was driven by emotions which blindly drew me to the next Mr. Temporary until I stopped to realize that there was a sick pattern going on here.
Once I rid myself of being a relationship wannabe and let go of all those guys who were just filling up space in my life, I was able to open up to authentic love and attract my ideal partner. Just like any addict, though, the first step in my love recovery was to admit that I had a love problem.
If this sounds familiar to you, check out these top signs that you are a love junkie…
1. You fall really fast for almost everyone you feel “chemistry” and physical attraction.
2. You expect to “seal the deal” and become anxious to expedite the relationship to a commitment level within the first month.
3. You exaggerate the reality of the relationship, making a one-night stand your new overnight boy/girlfriend before breakfast.
4. You tell all your friends about your new man within 24 hours of your first date. When you meet “the one” you typically know right away, but if you have done this more than three times in six months, then it is a warning sign.
5. You read bridal magazines and plan your wedding before you start dating someone serious.
6. You introduce him to your children after just a few dates and suggest that you should meet his family too.
7. You love listening to heartbreak songs on the radio after your latest breakup. You enjoy the crying and misery because you love being in love, even after it’s over.
8. You pick your wedding song before you meet Mr. Right.
9. You always like to have a romantic interest to talk about when having drinks or dinner with your girlfriends.
10. You jump from relationship to relationship like you were on a trapeze. You need another love interest to come into your life before you let go of the last one so you always have someone to think about.
If you are a love junkie, there is hope. You can break your addiction and come clean for real love instead of the romantic delusions you have been imbibing.
Step back and look at your dating patterns. Are the guys you fell for really someone you see yourself with for a lifetime or did you just get caught up in the moment (and the sex)?
Write a list of what you really want in a mate, both traits that are negotiable and non-negotiable.
Make a commitment to yourself to take it slow before you diving in and bring your head into the matters of your heart.
Trust that your lonely times are temporary and that great things are worth the wait.
Get all the happy, sexy love you desire,