Happy Sexy Love How to bulletproof relationships with happy, sexy love
Great teachers have been telling us for centuries that we all are made of one intelligent substance, so we all contain the same essential powers and possibilities to be great in life and love. So there absolutely is no reason you and your partner can’t be great and experience great love now. How do you start?
With the intelligent, conscious use and direction of this principle, men and women may grow in whatever direction you choose, without any limits–except those you choose to accept in your own thinking or old training.
How do you shatter old love limits?
Get this love power principle working for you, instead of against you: What you focus on grows.
If you focus on flaws in your partner or yourself, you feed and grow flaws. Does that sound familiar? Do you find yourself criticizing flaws in your partner or yourself, repeating the same negativity like a broken record? How is that working for you?
If you want to rekindle romantic love and healthy self love, here’s incentive to stop criticizing, backed by scientific research.
Relationship studies conducted by the John Gottman Institute revealed that it takes five positive actions to make up for one criticism or negative interaction in a relationship.
Take a moment now to recount each criticism or negative interaction you had with your partner or your self in the past day. In the past week. In the past month. In the history of your relationship. Add them up and multiply by five. What’s your total?
That’s how many positive interactions you need to initiate, starting today, if you want to resurrect love in a dying relationship and rekindle positive, loving growth that keeps relationships fresh and fun.
Are you resisting this news? Are you thinking of all the reasons why your partner doesn’t deserve your authentic compliments, your kindness, your positive attention, your appreciation, your thoughtful actions?
This thinking is another barrier to love and growth. Why?
What you focus on grows. If you want to grow a positive, loving connection with your partner, you will stop doing what doesn’t work and start doing what does. How?
From this day forward, you consciously and vigilantly will focus your attention on all the positives in your partner (and in your self, if your inner critic is stealing your joy and sabotaging your relationship with yourself and others).
It’s not enough to focus consistently on positives. You also must communicate your appreciation of these positives, by giving authentic compliments, by expressing how these positive qualities make you smile and inspire you to be more thoughtful, kind, caring, passionate and loving with your partner.
Want even more incentive?
There is one quality in you that makes your partner feel loved and deeply bonded to you. That quality is how you see your partner and make them feel about themselves. When you see the best in your partner, you bring out their best and build emotional bonds that endure. Why?
It’s worth repeating. What you focus on grows. This is supported in studies led by Chemistry expert, Dr. Helen Fisher, who revealed that the happiest couples shared one quality:
Happy couples sustain positive illusions about their partner.
Even if they’ve grown into couch potatoes through the years, they still see and tell each other that they love all their best qualities like they did when they fell in love. Dr. Fisher proved this floods their brains with happy love hormones, like oxytocin, that bond couples together at the start of a relationship. That’s how late-life couples continue to feel like young lovers.
Are you inspired to try this at home?
What if your positive new behavior startles or confuses your partner, who’s used to your negativity?
I suggest you ask your partner to start fresh in their view of you today and give you a chance to stop being negative and start doing things each day that grow happy, sexy love that lasts a lifetime.
Once they see your positive new behavior, imagine how this inspires their positive interactions and rescues respect, romance, passion and undying love.
I encourage you to do this at home, starting right now. Then tell us how this works for you in the comment box below.
Get all the happy, sexy love you desire,
Hadley Finch
