Happy Sexy Love How to bulletproof relationships with happy, sexy love
Single Americans spent $1.2 billion on internet dating sites in 2008. Top dating sites are vying for single members by offering imaginative matchmaking tools. Should you join top sites that use science-based tests to identify a compatible match? Would you rather join a community of singles who create an adventure in meeting your love match?
Before you choose or switch to a new dating site, let’s compare matchmaking tools to find the dating site and love match that’s right for you.
What are some science-based matchmaking tools used by top dating sites?
You take an hour-long compatibility quiz at eharmony.com to determine your ideal match. This site searches their singles database for your matches and they email dating profiles for you to review. You get to know matches through written Q&A until you agree to talk on the phone or meet.
When I used this site for almost a year, I followed their guided communication process. Yet I never felt inspired to chat by phone or meet a match in person. Why?
Not sure, but I wondered if each proposed match and I were so alike in our personality traits that one of us was unnecessary. Yet testimonials from eharmony-matched couples state that they only met one person on the site–but that person turned out to be The One. Did I end my membership too soon?
I was eager to meet matches in person versus email, so I joined another top site and met great matches on 3 continents.
In an offshoot of match.com, you take a lengthy chemistry test to determine if you’ve got the brain chemicals and traits of an explorer (high dopamine) or a builder (high seratonin) or a director (high testosterone) or a negotiator (high estrogen).
This chemistry test was developed by Helen Fisher, a research professor in anthropology at Rutgers who studied the brain chemistry of couples in love. Fisher told the New York Times that her team studied 28,000 singles on the site and found that explorers often select other explorers, builders choose other builders, and directors and negotiators pick each other.
I have used match.com to meet extraordinary explorers, directors and builders. I thought I’d met my love match–an American expat who is building a progressive community abroad–until two issues arose:
Should I give up my happy life in America where my college-age children live in order to be with an extraordinary love match? Should I agree to adopt a baby to satisfy his yearning to start a family?
I decided against this forever match. Many issues that unite or divide couples seeking the next great love of their lives are not addressed in chemistry tests. You discover these issues when you meet in person.
Would you be interested in a DNA test to find your genetic soulmate?
In genepartner.com you can swab your cheek for a DNA sample to find your genetic match. The DNA test is $99. For a monthly fee, they help you search for your genepartner.
Is there any scientific evidence that your DNA, brain chemistry, personality traits determine your best match, as claimed by these sites?
Jeffrey Lohr, a psychology professor in Arkansas, has studied these claims of top dating sites and he’s skeptical. Professor Lohr told the New York Times, “There is none to very little effectiveness in the (science-based) matchmaking process.”
What about a new dating site that is creating a community of singles with the attitude and action plan to meet your great love and live your dreams now?
It’s the only dating site that doesn’t post your age so you can meet your match at any age. No more blind dates, since you meet in singles chats on live video and in vacations for every budget.
Meeting a match in person is the best way to discover if there’s a mutual click of chemistry, core values, current goals dreams–no matter which dating site or matchmaking tools you use.
And if you’d like to meet your best love match in singles chats on live video and travel vacations, enjoy a singles free month in the Singles Club in Tribe Of Blondes.
Not a hair color, it’s a resilient, optimistic spirit that unites us and fuels our adventures in loving and living our dreams.
Ready to claim your free months trial membership?
Click on SINGLES CLUB in the menu bar and sign up now. Enjoy!
Dedicated to your dating and relationship happiness,
Hadley Finch
