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Love Test – What Are The Risks Of Betrayal By Fantasy?

Have you ever fantasized about a “crush” while you were having sex with your mate?

This is a one-question Love Test.

If you answered YES, then I suggest you snap out of it because you’re playing with dynamite. Why?

Betrayal by fantasy steals power and soul from your intimate relationship. Distracted focus often is a prelude to an emotional affair by one or both partners, which can take you down the slippery slope into a sexual affair.

You may be thinking this would never happen to you. That’s fantasy thinking, which is another threat to your primary relationship. Why?

Experts warn that every person and every relationship is vulnerable to betrayal by fantasy. When my marriage was on the rocks, my husband and I each admitted that we fantasized about a “crush” in our intimate moments — instead of being fully present in body-mind-soul for each other.

We learned the hard way how inviting crushes into your marriage bed, even in your fantasies, can be the crushing blow to your vows to be true and cherish each other.

I naively thought that talking openly about our crushes would weaken their hold on our fantasies. Instead it felt like a cruel, hurtful betrayal by fantasy that when acted upon eventually lead us into divorce court and hurt everyone we loved. How?

We weren’t able to heal the wounds of sexual affair that grew out of a fantasy crush. I accept equal responsibility for our break up. When my husband snapped out of his fantasy crush, I wasn’t fully available emotionally for a reconciliation due to my fantasy crush on a young man who reminded me of my husband as a young man.

I wrote about the risks of fantasy crushes in my song, The Boy You Used To Be. You can download and listen to this song at the end of this post.

What can you learn from my break up? Looking back at that painful period at the end of my long happy marriage, I now see that fantasy crushes are one way we may unconsciously try to revive the spark of desire that originally drew us together as a couple.

Yet it often starts a vicious cycle that can choke the life out of your primary relationship. Don’t let this dynamite destroy your marriage. Take advantage of the creative ways I recommend for you to revive romance and keep your relationship fresh without resorting to a risky betrayal by fantasy.

I wrote about the risks of fantasy crushes in my song, The Boy You Used To Be. You can listen to the song when you click this link: http://bit.ly/cgUGJm This song is on the album that is included as a gift with my 2009 novel, Tribe Of Blondes, which was inspired by my break up and adventures in starting a new life.

What can you learn from my break up?

Looking back at that painful period at the end of my long marriage, I now see that fantasy crushes are one way we may unconsciously try to revive the spark of desire that originally drew us together as a couple. Yet it often starts a vicious cycle that can choke the life out of your primary relationship.

Don’t let this dynamite destroy your marriage. I encourage you to use creative ways I recommend to revive romance and keep your relationship fresh without resorting to a risky betrayal by fantasy.

I invite you to share your stories about how you faced a fantasy crush in the comment box after this post.

And I’d like to give you the relationship success tools you need to bulletproof a relationship or recruit your perfect match if you’re single, and build better relationships with everyone in your life when you begin your exciting program at http://GreaterSuccessAndLove.com

Love deeply and live your dreams now,

Hadley Finch

About Hadley Finch

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