In part one of this series, you discovered the 3 critical components of success and the 3 proven steps you must take to guarantee you get your goals every time. Now you will learn how to find true love by taking 3 steps that will Shatter Your Speed Limits–Fast Track Your Success And Get What You Truly Want In Business and in Life. Author, Wendy Lipton-Dibner, and I discussed how to use this formula to find true love during my radio interview, which I’ve summarized for you.
Let’s recap the success formula which guarantees that we always get every goal:
Desire + Resources + Permission = Action.
Now you’ll get examples of how to take each step to find true love.
Step 1. Desire: You have to know what you truly want and why you want it.
If what you truly want is to find a love match, then ask yourself, “Why do I want this?”
Is it so you can enjoy great chemistry, communication and kindness in a loving relationship?
Or so you can share your life adventures, including challenges, and love and be loved by someone wonderful?
Consider many reasons you want to find love. Choose your strongest “Why” and write it down so it becomes real and drives you to take the next step.
Step 2. Resources: You identify the assets and abilities you already have along with additional ones you will need to reach your goal.
Resources can be anything from the right people to the right skills. Don’t over complicate this step. Here are potential resources to fulfill the goal of finding true love.
Right Skills:
Sign up for a dating site by entering your name and screen name, writing a dating profile, reading other profiles, creating a gmail account for your dating correspondence, contacting people on the dating site, chatting by email-video-phone, sorting through potential matches, meeting someone in a public place, seeing someone again if there’s a mutual click.
Sign up for a lunchtime matchmaking service and going out on lunch dates they arrange for you.
Choose dating clothes that make you feel great.
Choose a flattering new hair style and whiten your teeth if you drink coffee, tea or red wine.
Get some daily exercise, eat wholesome foods and get regular sleep so you look and feel your best.
Right People:
Tell friends and family that you’re ready to date someone special and ask if they have anyone in mind for you.
Line up a babysitter, if needed, so that you’re available for dates.
Make a list of the best qualities in yourself and in the people you admire, and then choose dates with these qualities.
Hire a matchmaker to introduce you to your most compatible love match.
List resources you still may need to find love, like budgeting to hire a personal matchmaker or buy new dating clothes.
With your resources in place, take the next step.
Step 3. Permission: Give yourself the green light to go for your goal and succeed
In order to give yourself permission, you must notice your own speed limits–which are rules put into place to keep you safe or fears that stop you from going where you want to go.
Some people let their rules, fears or circumstances block them from seeing or using their resources. In our example of finding a love match, some mental blocks that arise might be:
I can’t start dating until my children are in college.
All the good ones are taken, so why bother dating?
I’m too old to date.
Who would love me at my weight?
I might go out after I get a new job.
What’s the best way to handle these thoughts?
Ask yourself if they help you get what you want or block your progress.
Then look at the blocks and consider breaking or changing rules or excuses so they work for you.
You can choose to embrace your fears and move forward any way, without being reckless.
With your new rules and thoughts in place, now you are ready to use your resources and take actions to find true love.
What if you’re stuck in dead-end dating routines that sabotage love and marriage?
People often sabotage themselves out of relationships to protect themselves. Other times its because they were raised to believe things like they are not supposed to be happy or they’ve learned to live by rules that ruin relationships.
You look back at those old rules that you’ve been exposed to and that you may have followed. This self awareness helps you identify those rules or beliefs that are blocking you so that you can change them in ways that promote love and success in every aspect of your life.
In Part Three of our series, you’ll learn how to use this success formula to deal with difficult people at work or at home, and how to revitalize sexual intimacy in a long-term relationship.
Get all the happy, sexy love you desire,
Hadley Finch
How do selective singles find love in 12 weeks?