Let’s think of dating as a journey that you’ll love, when you identify your ideal destination and create a dating map of your preferred route to get there. How do you create your dating map?
By identifying where you are now and where you want to be. By identifying obstacles to avoid. By choosing the best path and partner for a delightful journey to a destination you both love.
How do you start creating your dating map?
It doesn’t make any difference if you’re dating online or meeting potential matches in daily life. You create your dating map by jotting down your answers to these questions:
Why are you dating?
Do you want to date for casual entertainment without commitment?
If so, you simply choose dates who enjoy your company now, with no future plans. That’s serial dating – a series of startups and breakups.
If there’s no emotional bonding between partners in casual dating, then breakups can be a breeze. It’s a simple GOOD-BYE and NEXT!
Are dating to find love and create a happy long-term relationship?
If that’s your dating destination, your journey will be more delightful if you navigate around dating minefields, leave old baggage behind and choose your best partner and path to reach your peak of love.
First you discover what you want in your ideal life and relationship by jotting down your answers to these questions:
* How important is a date’s career success, home address, physical appearance, bank account?
* Are you more concerned about how you look with your date than how you communicate? Or vice versa?
* Do you want to raise a family or blend families, if you already have children?
* Would you rather not have children and fulfill other goals and dreams with your partner?
* Have you achieved balance in your professional and personal life, or do you feel too busy for a relationship?
* Do you desire or require a monogamous relationship, or are you open to polyamory?
* Do you want to connect on deep, emotional levels with your partner or keep things light and easy?
* Do you want to develop emotional intimacy before you add sex to the mix?
* Do you equate sexual passion with love, or do you know the difference between lust and love?
* How important are your spiritual practices or religious beliefs, and must your match share them?
* How do you handle money, conflicts, setbacks, health and lifestyle choices and does your partner need similar or complementary skills?
* How do you know if someone loves you, and how do you show your love to your beloved partner?
* Do you want to know and be known without secrets, and connect with kind-hearted honesty?
* Do you believe love is all you need–or that love is not enough without common values?
* Do you appreciate all the wonderful qualities that you bring to a relationship?
* Are you eager to share your best and bring out the best in your great love match?
As you answer these questions, and also ask these types of questions in dating conversations, you clarify what you want in your best life and relationship. You become a conscious dater, who sorts through mis-matches without guilt. You choose to date, love and marry someone who shares your vision and enjoys your shared journey to the peak of love.
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