Don’t Criticize Secret Lovers On AshleyMadison.com

Hadley Finch August 25, 2015 affair repair of a marriage, Break Up Survival Guide Leave a comment

Satisfy sexual needs outside of a dysfunctional marriage?

There are 60 million married couples in America, plus 10 million co-habitating couples who live together without marriage. Recent news reports revealed that nearly half of married or committed US couples must have at least one partner who’d joined AshleyMadison.com to find a secret lover.

How did reporters get those statistics?

From AshleyMadison hackers who published names/emails of 38 million members seeking discreet lovers outside of their primary relationships.

That news fueled social media comments, which criticized AshleyMadison members for cheating on their spouses or partners.

Let’s walk in the shoes and ask a few questions of the betrayed partners. Are they victims of sexual infidelity? Or did they shut off a sexual relationship with their partner as punishment, or because of their own diminished sexual desire, or because religious dogma discourages sex unless its for procreation, or because of one partner’s inability to perform or satisfy the healthy sexual needs of each partner?

It’s empowering for each partner to take 100% responsibility for their own choices and results, so they never need to play the unhealthy victim role in life or love.

I’ve consulted with countless newly-single men and women who’d left a marriage or committed relationship after soul mates became sexless roommates (which can feel like prison mates), and cold criticism drained the life out of a relationship that may have been passionate before marriage or before the children were born.

Why do men and women who are denied a healthy, active sex life by their mate stay in a relationship?

Because they have young children to raise, or religious dogma prohibits divorce, or because they can’t afford to maintain two separate homes after a breakup. So these individuals avoid divorce and seek to fulfill their healthy sexual needs outside of their marriage.

Why is a healthy, active sex life so important?

Because having sex at least twice each week in a committed relationship of at least 4 years promotes sexual healing and prolongs happy vitality for a lifetime.

Men and women who are deprived of an active, healthy sex life with their partner often suffer physical consequences, which may be why they don’t live as long as people who sustain happy, sexy love that lasts in a relationship.

These men and women whose emotional and sexual needs aren’t being fulfilled in their primary relationship may have joined AshleyMadison to find a discreet lover in a similarly lifeless relationship, so they each can experience the happy longevity benefits of sexual healing that they aren’t getting in their dysfunctional marriage or relationship.

Some spouses actually encourage their partner to look for sex elsewhere, if they don’t tell them about it. Ignorance is not bliss in these dysfunctional relationships.

Many times, bliss is experienced in a discreet affair between two consenting adults who joined AshleyMadison to satisfy sexual needs and enjoy the longevity benefits of sexual healing.

What are your thoughts?

Let’s start a conversation in the comment box below this post.

Hadley Finch

P.S. How do couples overcome challenges like sexual deprivation, and rebuild a relationship after an affair or to prevent one?
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