As a couple recite their marriage vows,
they pledge to take their beloved to be their lawfully wedded husband/wife,
to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish,
till death parts them.
Marriage vows are betrayed by divorce statistics.
Only half of married couples will live up to their wedding vows
in first marriages. In subsequent marriages, 60 to 70 percent of
third and forth marriages will end in divorce.
What’s happening to the state of matrimony today?
Couples optimistically dive into the sea of marriage, but they
don’t know how to swim in choppy seas, when tidal waves of challenges
and disappointments slam them to their knees.
Couples optimistically believe that feelings of romantic love last forever.
Unfortunately, the feel-good brain chemicals (Cupid’s Cocktails) that bond
you to your beloved usually wane within 18 months to 3 years after
you start your relationship.
How do couples make sure they don’t lose that loving feeling after that?
How do couples beat the odds that their marriage will fail and increase
their chances of being happily married for a lifetime?
By busting Marriage Myth #2: I will always love you.
Couples sabotage their ability to build true, lasting love
because they mistakenly believe that love is a feeling.
Truth is: Love is a verb, an action word.
Love is taking consistent loving actions that make you and your partner
feel loved and lovable, even if you’re tired of making the effort.
Love is making a commitment to make love a priority in your life and relationship,
even if your partner fails to do the same.
Love is giving equal priority to meeting your needs and your partner’s needs for love, passion, health, happiness and romance in the safe haven of your relationship.
Love is honoring your commitment to know and be known, love and be loved, trust and be trusted, in good times and bad, till death parts you, even if your partner fails to live up to this commitment.
Love is uniting your relationship to a higher cause, like raising a family together, building a business together, working on spiritual or charitable cause together, to avoid getting bogged down by mundane duties of daily life
Love is speaking each others love language and expressing affection in ways that make you and your partner feel loved and appreciated every day.
Love is accepting the ebb and flow of emotion as a normal rhythm in a relationship and using tender touch to show affection and express love more eloquently than mere words can do.
Love is planning mutually enjoyable experiences in each day and making date nights each week to make fun a priority in your relationship.
Love is expressing authentic compliments and avoiding complaints and criticism that kill love, because what you focus on grows in life and love.
Love is celebrating your differences while fulfilling common goals and dreams as a team.
Love is honoring your commitment to keep love alive in your relationship and let love light your way through dark days, mundane duties, and endless distractions.
Love is accepting each other, flaws and all, so you can relax in your relationship without needing to be perfect.
Love is listening to what’s being said or not being said, so you respond to both and connect on deeper levels.
Love is spending enough time together so you each feel loved and valued by the most important people in your love life–you and your beloved partner.
Get all the happy, sexy love you desire,
Hadley Finch