Don’t waste valuable time dating the wrong person. Don’t settle for a dull, frustrating relationship. Don’t break up a long term relationship, regretting that your partner never got to know and love the real you.
Discover the fastest way to really get to know a date, or feel even closer to your mate in highlights of my radio interview for A Lasting Love with Dr. Winn Henderson. He’s a retired physician, radio host, author of Intimate Connections, plus 37 other books to help us build healthy bodies and happy lives.
Hadley: Before we help couples rekindle intimacy and romance, let’s show single men and women how to talk to a potential match in ways that test compatibility and accelerate intimacy. How do we start the process?
Dr. Winn: You find out if you’ve got potential for a long term relationship by measuring intimacy in two basic areas: your connection and chemistry.
Hadley: What gets measured gets improved. So how do we measure intimacy in these two areas?
Dr. Winn: I’ll show you how to go through my survey with a potential match, who lives anywhere in the world. And you’ll come up with a percentage of how connected you are.
For example, if you agree on all of the issues in the survey, then you are 100 percent connected. If you agree on half, then you are 50 percent connected. The higher the connection, the greater likelihood your relationship will last.
Hadley: What’s your cut-off point for compatibility?
Dr. Winn: I don’t have a cut-off point, because sometimes your chemistry is so high that you may accept a lower connectivity score. Yet I’d aim for at least a 90 percent connection score, where you like what the other person thinks in 9 out of 10 areas covered in the survey.
Hadley: It’s often said that you never know for sure what someone is thinking, yet you’re changing that. How?
Dr. Winn: You change the way you talk to someone. Usually, it’s on a superficial level of conversation back and forth. Yet your brain often is thinking something different from what you are saying, like “She’s not telling me the truth.” Or, “That’s the greatest thing I’ve ever heard.”
Hadley: This was visualized in the classic film, Annie Hall, when you heard what Diane Keaton and Woody Allen were saying to each other, and you read the subtitles of what they were thinking as they spoke. You’ve created a system to find out what’s really going on in someone’s mind.
Dr. Winn: The system only works if you value telling the truth more than discovering what kind of relationship might develop. If both people want to tell the truth and they’re willing to express what’s going on below surface conversation, then you develop intimacy quickly using this system.
Hadley: Relationships not grounded in truth may be doomed to fail. How do you trust that someone is totally honest in this survey?
Dr. Winn: You make a verbal contract with each other, which can last for a few hours to do the survey or for a month or forever. You agree to be transparent and always tell the truth, regardless of whether you feel it will be good or bad for a relationship.
Hadley: I encourage people to use kind-hearted honesty, where you speak your truth in ways that consider the other person’s feelings, without devastating or destroying them. I assume you’re not talking about using honesty as an excuse to be mean, when you take this survey.
Dr. Winn: You want to be soft, gentle, compassionate and empathetic. You can’t develop an intimate relationship from a mean basis or from a desire to manipulate or take advantage of someone.
Hadley: What are the best topics to discuss that develop intimacy quickly with someone you’re dating, or deepen intimacy with your romantic partner?
Find out in Part 2 of our series to help you interact in ways that accelerate and deepen intimate connections.
And get instant FREE access to this intimacy survey as a gift from Dr. Winn when you email him at Winn@WinnHenderson.com Include a Subject line: Free Book For Hadley’s Tribe. He’ll send you the digital book. If you like it, he asks you to post a comment online at amazon and barnesandnoble.
And don’t waste valuable time dating the wrong people. Get 7 new ways to find great people to date, love and marry in my FREE report at www.IFindLoveFast.com
And you get dating advice like this, as I guide your love quest and help you choose your great love match in TribeOfSingles.com dating site, where marriage-minded singles find love-guaranteed. Take a FREE look around as my guest now.
Get all the love and happiness you deserve,
P.S. Know someone who’d use this news? Be sure to share it now by clicking SHARE and TWEET. They’ll appreciate your thoughtfulness.